Remember why you really come.

Not too long ago I was having a conversation with an associate of mine that turned bitter and lead to an argument. It was resolved quickly, complete with apologies and well wishes, but during that flashpoint of anger, I was kindly told about myself. Although it was said out of anger, much of it was true and true to the adage, the truth hurts.

I like to self analyze from time to time and although it may be biased in my favor, I generally try to address my flaws and not downplay them. I was thinking about the words said and how they apply to me when I was overcome with this great depression. It were as if someone had placed a heavy cloak upon my shoulders, wrapping around me, enveloping me. It was suffocating me when I started thinking, am I just playing church? If the things said were true then surely that must mean that I’m playing church every weekend, that I’m just wasting my time. What’s the point of even going.

This is dangerous thinking for the Christian mind.

By this point you might be wondering, what is “playing church.” I define playing church as the act of putting on the guise of being a Christian without actually living the life. This applies to both believers and non-believers who think they are. It is more than living in sin (although that is a key factor) it is about willfully attempting to defy what God has ordained. Scripture tells us that God’s word doesn’t come back void (Isaiah 55:11) therefore it stands to reason that a person who regularly goes to church and is being taught the word and yet actively conspires against it, that person is playing church. It’s not something they are serious about and their very faith in Christ may be in question. After a few minutes lost in thought, I realized that I was under spiritual attack. If the adversary can get me to doubt and question then he will pull me away from God.  I wanted to be sure so I prayed about it, and thought about it and the Holy Spirit gave me an answer.

The person playing church does so for several reasons, chief among them is the need to point out how Godly and righteous they are. They like the attention they get from it. I think I speak for a lot of people when I say that the reason I go to church is because I’m sick. It’s a spiritual hospital, not the building itself but the gathering of believers, all praying and worshipping together in harmony. That’s why I go to church. It is said that we are not to forsake the gathering of believers (Hebrews 10:25) and if you’re a Christian, you know why. I love being around my Brothers and Sister in the Lord. Carrying each others burdens, having fun together, listening to each other, learning together about the Lord…the benefits are endless. And yes like any family there is drama but that’s going to happen any time you get people together because we’re not perfect. In fact, that’s one of the reasons I love the bible. The individuals in it are flawed. Some greatly so, and it isn’t always a happy ending. Even people like David, a man after God’s own heart (Acts 13:22) had to suffer because of his sin. But it also shows a loving God that cares for His creation, so much so that He gave up His Son.

Another reason I like going to church is that I enjoy being taught God’s Word. I don’t do it all the time but, I like to take notes and go home and look things up. Along with reading along in church, you want to take notes so you can look it up yourself. It’s one thing to be taught but it’s another to learn it for yourself. Besides, you have to make sure the right things are being said. Mistakes can be made and sometimes people purposefully mislead others.

There is more but I think the point is clear that although I am still flawed, I am going to church for the right reasons and that I’m not wasting my time. It’s amazing how quickly you can get turned around, away from Godly thinking, if you aren’t careful. I need to be better about putting on the Armor of God (Ephesians 6:10-18) in the morning. On the other side of it I’m sort of glad this individual said what they said because it made me turn to the Lord for an answer. The lives we live are not easy, we go through things. But going through them together lightens the load and hones your edges. And with the strength of the Lord, anything can be overcome. I know it’s hard sometimes but hard doesn’t mean impossible. I just hope that I remember that the next time I lose my bearings.